I don't like to write about things like work and other serious stuff in my blog. :)
Most of the time, I find myself sticking to writing about mushy things ... random things that I don't talk about much in real life.
But today, I'd like to blog about something very close to my heart :) and something I try very hard not to talk about too much in real life, for various personal reasons.
Lately, I guess I've been thinking about Phat Culture a lot.
How it has grown.
How it has impacted me as a person.
How it has changed May and I. (for the better? ... or worse?)
I can't help it, but a part of me feels that my life has become entwined with what started off as a small risk and part-time hobby... All the small sacrifices that I (and May) have made over the past year, all the obstacles we've had to go through, and how we evolved along with the biz. We've never been that fashion-conscious prior to this ... but now, my daily reads are NyMag and Fashionising ... waa-aaay different from what I used to read.
So at some point or other, the big question the comes:
Are all these (supposedly) small changes worth it?
I no longer spend so much time writing random stories, nor do I blog much anymore.
I no longer read as much as I used to ... so many books I collected from quaint lil' bookstores are sitting on my shelf, collecting dust.
Whatever happened to my random weekend trips? And photography?
I did not have faith that May and I would be able to make it through unscathed and unaffected ... =( when there is money involved, a lot of things are put at risk - especially ego, pride and friendship.
I was afraid that the same way our friendship blossomed through Phat Culture ... it would be the same way it'd fall. We are so different ... how could two people as different as she and I actually have an ongoing healthy partnership? o_O
... then I remind myself, gently, that all these things do not matter when you both love the same thing. :) That hard work always pays off. Failure only happens when you begin to doubt yourself ... and when you start losing faith.
If there is one good thing that I've learned from Phat Culture - it'll have to be humility. Pride always comes before a fall ... and we've had to learn it the hard way.
In whatever that you pursue ... it's always important to keep a humble heart :) and never forget your roots - who you really are.
The purpose of this post?
... To remind myself to never give up.
There will be really shitty times ... times that makes you feel worthless, drained out and you'll feel like it isn't worth the pain, time and effort.
But if you really believe in it ... and if you really work for it, it will be worth it.
We'll be fine, yea?
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